To me Amy Winehouse wasn’t just a musician, she was an angel. Yes she had drug issues and yes she wasn’t always an ideal role model but she led me through some dark times and for that I am eternally grateful.

When I was a teenager I listened to her albums constantly. I have memories of dancing around my bedroom to her rendition of “cupid” and I cannot even count how many times I have watched her acoustic videos on youtube. Through Amy Winehouse I learnt that being different was okay, it was okay for me to rat my hair big, and it was okay for me to want to wear vintage clothing before they became ‘mainstream’. I piled on the eyeliner for school and was horrifically bullied for looking ‘dirty’ and bitches laughed at me, but Amy did it, so it made me okay with that. I understand that she was a celebrity and that I didn’t really know her, but I find grasping that notion difficult. When I found out she had died I felt numb and like I had lost a friend – is this how my mum felt when Jimi Hendrix died?

So what she had drug problems? Does that make her a terrible person…  She was a lost young woman who was obviously too good for this world. Addiction is a terrible demon and unfortunately Amy just couldn’t fight it. To me she was loved, and the tributes that are flooding the internet prove that many people loved her. unfortunately people are using the internet to express their negative judgements on her – we all know a junky or alcoholic and they have friends, family and people who love them, if one of them died would you jump on you moral podium and judge, the answer is probably no… so why is it okay to do it when it is a celebrity?

It is to raw for me to be able to listen to her music at the moment. Maybe in the next few days I will play her albums and reflect on one of the greats of our time. My fiance Scott was lucky enough to see her in concert and I know he feels humbled by that. I do not want to remember her by what she became, I will remember her as the icon she was – with a huge beehive, retro tattoos and a fabulous cleavage.

She was a genius.

Amy Winehouse, I love you and miss you already.

Sleep tight and go sing in heaven you angel.